Philip Joseph "P.J." O'Connor
—
The following serves as a gentle correction to earlier accounts, ensuring the full circle of family is honored and remembered.
Philip Joseph O'Connor was born in Salem, Massachusetts, on , and passed peacefully, yet unwillingly, on , at his home in Hendersonville, North Carolina, at the age of 82, after a long battle with pancreatic cancer.
Life offers no clean narratives. It is a mosaic of choices, connections, and consequences — some that lift, some that wound. Philip's story reflects this truth. He lived across three marriages, each chapter carrying its own joys, challenges, and lasting ripples. To some, he was a steady presence, a coach, a cheerleader for the Michigan State Spartans, and a man who could craft the perfect banana split. To others, he was absent or imperfect, leaving silences that shaped lives as deeply as any words spoken. Both were true. He was human — capable of profound respect and care in one moment, and limitation or distance in another.
Philip grew up in Lynn, Massachusetts, playing on award-winning teams in football, basketball, and baseball. He graduated from Essex Aggie High School, attended Michigan State University, and earned a triple major in Human Resources, Business Management, and Labor Relations. His career spanned decades and companies — General Motors, Raytheon, LTV Vought, Dee Howard Company, EADS Sogerma, Elbit Systems, M7 Aerospace, and finally as CEO of 4M Logistics. Colleagues remember him as someone who looked beyond titles, treating people with dignity and understanding. He believed in the value of every individual, and that belief left marks — sometimes healing, sometimes not.
His passions were straightforward: golf (a lifelong love discovered later), sports, and simple pleasures like strawberry or coffee ice cream. He coached Little League, passed on enthusiasm for athletics, and carried a quiet pride in his work and his family.
Philip's life reminds us that every person we encounter has a story worth hearing — full of light and shadow. We all have the power to be a force in someone else's life: a word of encouragement that stays forever, a moment of presence that matters, or an absence that teaches hard lessons. His journey shows that change — for good or ill — often happens in small, daily ways, and that grace, forgiveness, and understanding can bridge even the widest gaps.
He is survived by his children with Sara Sweeney O'Connor: Mark, Bethlee McLaughlin, Brian (and wife Dr. Jennifer Freeman-O'Connor), Jessica (and husband Stephen Sadoway), and Kerry (and husband Marcus Stagliano); and by Barbara's daughter Dr. Alyson Brink (and husband Dr. Jeremy Deans). He was a grandfather to Benjamin, Christopher, Daniel O'Connor, Andrea Ortiz, Emily, Abbey, and Jake Sadoway, Owen McLaughlin, Ethan and Zachary O'Connor, Sara and Ian Stagliano, and cherished by many cousins, lifelong friends, and newer companions. He was preceded in death by his parents, Philip Joseph O'Connor Sr. and Olga Paszkowski O'Connor; his brother Dennis S. O'Connor; and Barbara's son John Joseph "J.J." Brink IV.
Philip now rests. We are grateful for the lessons his life offers: to see the humanity in others, to offer kindness when we can, to reflect on our impact, and to hold space for the full stories of those around us. May his memory inspire us to be more present, more compassionate, and more aware that every interaction leaves a legacy.
A celebration of Philip's life will be held at , in the chapel of Church Street Funeral and Cremations,
125 S Church Street, Hendersonville, NC 28792. The family will receive friends from to prior to the service.In lieu of flowers, consider a gift to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, in recognition of the ways we can support one another through life's deepest struggles.
With gratitude for the life lived, and peace for the journey completed.
— The family of Philip Joseph O'Connor